Totally Unexpected Adventure
by HugLoverwithCazyHair
Summary: My first story ever. Hi! I am Caroline! My brother just left - he's gone to Italy to mom and dad, leaving me home alone. Again. I thought " Hey let's have a movie night, eat toasts, have fun. So I was making food and then heard a crash. Beeing all brave I decided to check it. Finding THE Thorin Oakenshield Company in my salon was not what I expected. CHAPTER 4 IS OUT :3
1. What ?

_**A/N: Okay this is my first story like ever. xddd. I hope you will like it. Please leave a comment and tell me your opinion. DON'T be afraid to say something harsh - I won't be sad. I rather hear the truth than lies telling me story is fine. Haaha. God my friend told me to write a fanfic so here I am. I'm not good at writing but maybe this story will be liked so I thought why not ! Btw sorry for the grammar - I am not from English speaking country * shame *. I am Polish. But not about me. So like I said. I hope You enjoy!.**_

_**Ahhh I almost forgot. I don't own The Hobbit. If I did three best characters would not die. Hehe. **_

**_Question for all my readers: What is your fav color, fruit and animal ? Plus Check the updates! Xoxo_**

''Ughhhh why this crap is so slow ''I growled and smacked my computer for at least 100th time this day, not knowing I will probably regret that later. Yep today is definitely not my day. But I guess I should begin with the introduction right ?

Okay so what should I start with ? Name? Surname ? Age? Blah blah blah ? Normal people usually follow that. Well newsflash I'm not normal, not at all. So to be original I will begin with telling you this day something I would never, ever, EVER expect to happen happened… You must be thinking '' what the heck is she talking about ''. Well I'm trying to tell you that this boring and awful evening turned out to be great... Damm I'm not good at writing down my feelings. Okay. So to the main point – I met Thorin Oakenshield Company. No, not the cosplayers ( pfff I was a coseplayer I know how they look like). I guess right now I will follow the Blah blah introduction.

Sooo… My name is Caroline Drago. Yeah I know, great surname. Well my real one was just too plain and I felt a need to change. I went from the original one to Forbes, then Mikaelson, then Caro then Angeli and finally stayed with Drago. I believe I'm gonna change it again soon. I mean OFFICIALLY my last name is still the same. I just introduce myself like that. My friends know the real one... Ughh. SORRY bout that ! I have a nasty habbit of talking too much and switchinhg the topic. My bad…

Carrying on, I'm Caroline what is more I'm 15 going on 16 ! Yay. Haha. OKey what is important ? Well obviously I'm a girl. The body shape ( if anyone intrested) is pear. I mean I'm not fat but not skinny either. More like in the middle you know ?. I am 169 cm tall and my weight is 57 if you care xd.

I have green eyes, brown curly hair reaching down my shoulders ( even though most of the time they look as if lightning struck me ) and bright smile, at least they say so.

I usually wear jeans or black pants with T-shirts and leather jacket. My favourite colors are gray, white, black. Yep so much for the rainbow lover. Hmmm. Any other facts ? I LOOOOOOOOOVE to eat, hug and befriend people, Hobbit and Lord of The Rings ( pfff who does not !? ), Transformers, Vampire Diaries, The Originals and other stuff you probably won't / don't watch.

Kay enough about me! Unless there are questions…

Soooo where was I ? Ahh right. Lets start with what the hell happened ! Though I can't understand it myself, I will try to explain.

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It was nice evenig i must admit. The sky didn't have any clouds, stars could be seen not to mention the moon which was shinnig beautifully. My neighbours for once were quiet, parents not at home, brother sleeping in his room, soft street noises coming from behind my window. Normally I would have called that a perfection. I don't need a lot to be happy. Just add a good book/fanfiction, cup of my beloved green tea moreover blanket on my back and I will squeal with happiness. On top of that, If I could lie on my couch = HEAVEN. So if all the points were fulfilled then Why wasn't it THE GOD PLACE ?

Well the reason is quite obvious to me.

I was fighting with my laptop again. Everyday is the same. This ,,old'' boy breaks all the time. Yes my Laptop is a he ( Name is Spike ).

'' OH come on ! Not again ! " I whined. I was peacefully trying to watch behind the scenes of The Hobbit but Spike was having diferent plans. I spent 15 minutes trying to refresh the page AND not lose it again but the crap wouldn't work. As always. One second I am watching BTS from Rivendell and not even a minute after I am glaring at my computer mumbling curses. The screen turned black and I heard a voice repeating the same word all over again.

Great. I smacked my laptop, not hard but not soft either, and waited. It usually worked. The sound stoped and I let a small victory smile spread across my face. Little did I know the victory was only temporary. Black screen turned white, red, blue, yellow and other colors of the rainbow while my eyes went wide. _THAT never happened before! I thought._ I got of my couch and slowly got back from the I smelt as if something was burning.

' 'Nooooo ! '- I screamed throwing my hands in the air. Great, just freaking great. This is SO not happening. Spike just burned. God, how ? _Well, at least he burned inside and didn't damage anything else. _Alwaysan optimist. I sighed. Spike was only 3 years old and already been broken like 30 times. Not my fault. I mean 10 times were my fault the rest I have no idea what happened. I looked at my now smokey laptop and quickly realised a few things.

was repaired WAY too many times and each time mom and dad told me it's the last repair.

2. The last time they MENT it.

3. He is my 7th laptop/computer.

4. ALL my files ( school stuff, music, movies, serieses blah blah blah) were there.

5. I am totally screwed.

Plus my parents gonna kill me. Wonderful. Just wonderful. All of a sudden an idea popped into my head.

Jack!

He is my older brother. You know the '' tall, handsome hartbreaker'' type? Well this is my bro. Jack stands 190 cm tall, has broad shoulders ( not that broad for me ), chest that even the hottest celebrtities could be jealous of and smile to die for. His eyes are green like mine and his haircut is short, but not too short if you know what i mean. So chestnut hair and grass like eyes. Oh, did I mention dimples ? Yep my brother could definitely play a hot guy in a high school movie. He makes every girl I know go weak in her knees. I am always the one who sees him as messy and rather average 20 year old man. Every time I call him average my friends give me wide eyes and say: Whaaat? He's perfect!

And that's when I think about his ,, perfection''. Makes mess everywhere he goes, annoyes crap out of me, Steals my stuff, is always grumpy when I'm around. But even though sometimes I wanna kill him , I love him more than anything... GOD we are off the topic again!

Why did I mention Jack ? Well, when it comes to technology he is GOD. I am not joking now. He can fix annything in a matter of hours, sometimes minutes, even seconds. Yep he is useful, specially if I break a lot. I break, he fixes.

Ughh. Back to Spike!

I decided that I should ask my brother to repair Spike, thank him, promise a reward and then mom and dad wouldn't try to kill me. Yay. _That sounds as a plan! _I thought happily. I walked over to my couch and took the laptop in my hands. I hissed in pain when my palms came in contact with hot bottom of the device, but I didn't drop it. _I bet hell isn't even as hot as this shit. _I took off to my brothers room which was at the end of the corridor. _Damm I swear my hands gonna turn into grilled chicken_. I tried extremely hard not to let the laptop fall out of my hands. I once did. And let's just say computers and floors don't like each other. When I reached his room I didn't even bother knocking. I just bursted inside waking my brother in the process.

,,Ohh Jackie !''I said in sing like voice and quickly threw the laptop on the top of his, well, I guess a chiar. Like I said earlier he was a messy person. And EVEN I have to say that. I looked around his ,,territory,, as he would call it what is more realised that nothing much changed since the last time I have been here. That was 3 weeks ago... His clothes were lying practicly everywhere. The wardrobe was open and I swear I saw something moving there. _Must be a rat. Wait, WHAT?! _I tried to ignore that thought. Nevermind. Pizza boxes were standing in tall columns. I counted 2 that were towering me. The floor was barely visible under so much junk, the yellow walls were full of projects of his new inventions and posters of his Idols. You must think they were Einstein or Newton. You are wrong. Of course he loved those guys ( can't see why xd ), but his Idols were... Rockstars. I know, my bro is weird. But hey! We both love Axl Rose so he's not that bad. Anyway. I will spare you the description of the rest of his room cause you might get a heart attack and I don't want anyone to die. Let's just say, normal people would have thought a tornado went through his room. I won't disagree. Imagine the dirtiest, messiest, untidiest, disguistingest ( that's not even a word but hey) room ever.

I cautiously walked to Jack's bed and gently shook his arms. That was not easy to be done for he was sleeping under a giant quilt with some of his drawings on it. Did I mention he could draw like goddamm DaVinci ? Ughh.

My brother wouldn't wake up for 10 minutes and that's why my patience ran out. I took a deep breath just to sream as loud as I could. That got him. I never saw someone jump out of bed with that speed. That was hilarious. Him standing in the ninja position with his black pants and panda bears T-shirt looking around the room as if something was going to attack him in matter of seconds. I laughed loudly at his reaction. He just glared at me with annoyance and brushed off whatever was covering his shirt. We did a staring contest for a a while and then I reminded myslelf why did I even go there.

''You need to fix my laptop. It went all Kaboom – whuush again'' – I told him while waving my hands like some maniac. He just crooked his head and smirked. Ahh I know that one. The smile that said: "You come here cause you need me to save your ass''. What can I say? My bro knows me best.

,,Care stop breaking stuff. You really have a bad thing for electronics. Ever thought about contacting a doctor ? I mean seriously '' – he said teasingly. Yup me and comptures, TVs, laptops, microwaves anything like that = Disaster. Sad but true. I just rolled my eyes and huffed.

'' And what will I say ? Hey doc listen I have this problem that every time I go near something electronic it goes all cray cray whiizz shuuush ? Yeeesss. because he won't send me to mental asylum .'' I replied and tapped my head.

Jack laughed and so did I. Most people would start an argumenet but that's not us. We can offend each other, scream and shout at each other, call each other psychos and stuff like that but we would never actually fight. Never did and never will. I walked to his chair and took Spike in my hands. He was still hot but not the ''I'm gonna fry you'' hot. I slowly approached Jack.

'' Now really, can you fix it ?'' – I asked with hope in my voice while handling the laptop over. He sighed and looked at Spike. His face paled and Jack looked as if he just saw a ghost. His eyes were dancing between me and my laptop. I doubt he has ever seen Spike in that condition. When I realised he never reacted like that I took a double take on my PC and damm he looked worse than I thought. His silver cover was now black and smelly, the keyboard was totally damaged, and the screen looked as if I punched it. This is definitely the worst damage I/God knows what caused. Shit. No way he is going to repair him. The only thing he could do was to buy a new one and I couldn't ask him to do that. My shoulders slumped. Jack frowned but wasn't put off by Spike's condition. He looked my laptop over warily, spinned a little bit, looked at the bottom, even smelled it. The whole ,,process'' took him about 3 minutes however for me it felt like ages. Finally he looked at me with his emerald eyes, I held my breath and waited for his judgement.

" Care I am not going to lie.''- _Bad sign... Bad sign... - '' _This time the poor boy's condition is the worst you did. And honestly I have no idea how you did that, but any normal person would tell you there's no way to fix Spike." He threw my laptop in the air, did a spin and caught it again, a wide grin spreaded on his face. " But don't forget sis. I'm not a normal person. Give me a week, 9 days max. '' He said as he put Spike on his bed. ''Trust me sis, I am the best in the world'' He winked at me. God I swear, he is so cocky sometimes. This time it didn't irritate me, no, this time it made me giggle.

'' Thank you Jack. '' - I replied and threw my arms around his neck, which was quite hard ( curse his height). When I drew back I pocked his chest and teasingly confidently stated:

''You're not the best in the world. The best person ever is Gandalf. ''

'' Ah - ah - ah - he waved a finger at me - Gandalf is not real, and I am''. I stack my tounge out at him. _Huh. We hugged like seconds ago and now we're teasing. Ehh. Normal. _All of a sudden my brother became serious. Then terrified. Then confused and terrified once more. ''Care" he hesitantly inquired '' What day is today ? '' Da fuq? Really? By the look of his face I thought he put the TV remote in the fridge or that maybe he murdered someone and forgot to hid the body ( Yep. Black humor lads xd) or I don't know, broke our parents vase. But no, he asks me the current day.

'' It's Friday. You know, Friday the 16th? 16th of January ? '' I answered calmy and glanced at him suspiciously. ''Jack what did you do ?'' As soon as the last word left my mouth I saw my brother fill his ,,travel bag''with clothes in the speed of the light with the look of horror on his face. _Wait, why the hell is he packing ?! Mom and Dad in Italy and he was supposed to be there... Oh shit. Ohh shit. SHIT. _My mind screamed at me for not reminding him that his plane leaves today. Ughhh _STUPID _I scolded myslef. The moment I realised what was happening I started to clean his room. Why would I do that ? Well mom and dad clearly stated that if he was to join them in Italy he's room had to be tidy. I looked at his black clock and saw it was 7 pm. Plane leaves at 10:00. _He still has time_. At least I hoped so. After 20 minutes my bro had all the luggage he needed, his place all tidy and shiny ( Call me God, I have no idead how I managed to do that), hair done, breakfast/lunch/dinner/supper eaten, my compuer packed in his hand luggage, tickets packed and all that jazz. He was now standing at the porch waiting for the taxi to arrive. I walked over to him.

'' I can't believe you would miss Italy. It's the only country in Europe you haven't been to... '' I winked at him smiling, but soon the grin disappeared from my face. And now you will be gone for 3 weeks'' - I said staring at the bright sky. God it was truly beautiful. I heard him snicker so my eyes left the night ocean and landed on him. He was smirking again.

'' If I had not known you, I would say you're going to miss me'' He said in a teasing voice. I punched him on the arm lightly. We both giggled and soon a comfortable silence fell over us. The cab arrived within 5 minutes. _God that was fast_ I thought with disbelief. I turned to Jack again and hugged him ever so thigtly as if I was not going to see him for the rest of my life. I had a strange feeling about this trip but I didn't want to worry Jackie.

'' Be careful, take care and don't party too hard''. He laughed in response.

'' Care are you my mom ? I will be fine, I'm freaking 20 ! ''. I knew he was right, it was just the strange feeling I couldn't shake off. But oh well, he is a grown guy. Sort of. For the last time in this month we exchanged hugs, glances, funny faces ( no goodbye without these) and high fives.

My brother got into the taxi and waved his hand at me. I waved back and watched as the car grow smaller and smaller and soon vanish grom my view. I sighed and went back to the house. Closing the door I let my thoughs flow.

_ Jackie is on a life adventure in Italy. Mom and dad are with him. As always. *SIGH* And once again I'm home alone. Yay. Just like Kevin. All alone. All alone in freaking 200 square meters. Nah Kevin at least had fun with burglars... Hmm what to do? Draw? Nah.. Paint? Nah... Read! Yeah that is.. Ow wait no. I already read everything. Shit.. Hmmm. Music..Yes! Let's start with music! That's the basic of __existence. _

As I thought I did. I took ou my phone ( the only thing that I never destroyed) used the app my brother designed and sweet sound of Disciple's song filled my ears.

_**Our faces were forgotten, the unrecognizable**_  
><span><em><strong>It's a mystery in this paradox.<strong>_

I turned on the ""WHOLE HOUSE"" option and soon my home was filled with pleasant melody, at least it was pleasing for me. I smiled and sang along. It was one of my favourite songs.

All of a sudden I felt a need to eat something. I mean I'm hungry most of the time but then I felt a special hunger I only feel for one thing in the world. Yep. I have cravings for food. My grin grew wider and I decided to ask.

'' So stomach, Jackie is gone and you sense it don't you ? You silly monster. Always for toasts when family is gone. You want toasts? '' I heard him growling back with what I assumed was excitement. I laughed hearly as I patted my stomach. Yes I'm a wierdo who has conversations with my stomach. Not only him. Feel free to call me insane but he has emotions too ! I walked into the kitchen in dance - dance way and looked around. _Thank God it's clean. _Don't get me wrong. It's not like our entire house is always messy it's just... Nevermind - not important. So everything seemed to be in order. I could easily see my reflection in black tiles and in white floor ( good sign). That was the most important thing for my dad. Keep the kitchen clean. Rest doesn't matter. I walked over to black fridge and grabbed the butter, then I headed to white cupboard and took my beloved toast bred out. I smelled it and soon I felt the happiest person in the world. haha. I quckly shoved them in the toaster and decided I should go change.

I took black Linkin Park shirt and jeans of and put my pyjama on. How did I look like ? Well kinda like a guy. I was wearing my brother's old gray sleeveless shirt with PSYCHO KILLER written in black letters on it what is more knee long,checked pants which colors were yellow, white and gray. The most comfortable clothes ever.

_ Ahhhh I love this outfit. Perferct for movie night. Yes! That't it! I'm gonna have a movie night. Wonder what's on TV today. _

When the idead popped in my head I was overjoyed. I finally came up with what do to, beside eating and music. I entered the living room and checked TV. The Avengers were on. Yay. Robert Downey Junior for the rescue from boredom! And ofcourse Tom Hiddleston and his voice. Urgh I have a soft spot for men with accents. I grinned like a kid who has just seen a candy. I ,,traveled'' back to the kitchen to bring the toasts and start the movie night.

I was putting butter on my ,,delicious meal " when I heard a deafening crash. Momentaly I stopped my actions and sharpened my hearing. I heard grunts and puff. _Not my dog, not the Smiths. Shit someone broke in. Oh God everything but that!_ This was not okay. Suddenly I heard voices coming from my living room. Any normal person would probably have phoned the police and quietly hid somewhere in the house but not me. I gulped and took a deep breath. _Whoever this is he will feel_ my_ wrath if something was damaged. _I thought boldly. I needed a plan. A good plan. At least a tolerable plan. Think fast. Think fast.

_ Okay, if they are armed I am in deep shit, if not then maybe I have a chance to get rid of them. Damm I'm turning into Kevin. I swear if those_ burglars_ gonna look like Marv and Harry I'm cutting my hair C__ulkin style__. _I took the plate with golden toasts ( First time I didn't burn them and I have robbers in my house, my freaking luck) in my left hand and grabbed a kitchen knife with the right. Taking another deep breath I slowly moved towards salon, watching my every step. God I have never felt that nervous in my entire life. When I finally reached the door frame I heard someone cursing softly.

_ The guy sounds old. Why would a senior break into the house ? Wait.. The voice sounds familiar. No. Don't think about that stupid ! _I mentally scolded myself. I decided to peek and check what my opponent looks like. What I have seen was faaaaaaaar from what I was expecting to see. A tall man was standing with his back turned to me. Okay I have seen tall guys before but his height was not the thing that got me staring. It was, well his look in general. He was wearing a grey, pointy wizard hat, a matching grey robe and held a long staff. His grey/white hair fell down his shoulders.

_ WTF?! Why is the burglar dressed like Gandalf?! For God's sake The Company is here too? Yeah right. Maybe they are not robbers but cosplayers. But how the hell did they get in? Hmm the costume is very well done. Wonder how much time he spent with the wig. Urgh Stop! He still broke into your house! _

Before I could ask him wtf he thought he was doing, shock paralyzed me. I was now standing in the doorway, with a kitchen knife raised ninja style, plate of toasts, mouth agape, eyes wide staring at '' Gandalf'' or rather what was in front of him. (Yes the ''wizard '' moved a little as if he knew I wanted to look, again wtf? )

There before me was _**THE**_ Thorin Oakenshield Company. Balin, Dwalin, Oin, Gloin, Nori and Dori were lying on top of each other grumbling. Bombur on the black couch with his head stuck between the cushions, Bifur and Bofur were somehow tangled in red hangings and Ori wrapped in the crimson carpet. _What the hell!?_ Shock was slowly fading away and I was about to ask what was happening when I heard a groan. My eyes shot to the place where it came from. I didn't know it was possible but my eyes grew even wider when I saw Fili and Kili lying on a book shelf, books all over them and I think I saw one in their pants, that I heard was cracking under their weight. Poor Bilbo was hanging from the chandelier, clutching it.

_ Okay don't freak out. These are just cosplayers that broke into your house. Maybe you know them. Maybe it's Chris from the last cosplayers meeting. Or Jared. Or Adam. with their friends. Deep breaths. Wait. Where is Thorin? Haaa ! Not complete cosplay!_ That was when my eyes spotted the dwarfen King. He was standing next to Gandalf his sword raised as if ready to attack. He was looking around but failed to notice me. Yay, invisibility - level Caroline. My eyes did linger on him longer. I mean he was hot. The hottest dwarf in the company. His hair might have been a mess and he could have had a few traces od blood on his face but still - handsome. Blame Richard Armitage and his eyes and voice and body and everything.

_ STOP FANTASING ABOUT FICTIONAL CHARACTER! _Again I taunted myself.

I could not believe my eyes. 13 dwarves, A hobbit and a wizard. Are in my house. My living room. Not even 6 meters from me. _ THEY ARE NOT_ REAL_ YOU MORON _I reminded myself._ Of course! they have to be cosplayers. Wow the outfits are great. Maybe I should ask where did they get them.. URGHH NO!_ The dwarves were trying to get up from their places and I heard Gandalf counting them and asking if they were fine. _Wow, dude totally nailed the voice._

I gues the fact I was so shocked, confused and angry was the reason that my hand lost it's grip which resulted in dropping the plate and my dear, beloved, delicious toast falling to the ground. They must have heard the plate crash because suddenly all eyes were at me. I just continued to stare at them and they stared at me. Now the whole room was frozen. I believe Biblo beat me when it comes to the width of eyes.

_ Must be the way I'm dressed. They have to think I'm a guy. Wait no. I have a girly face and my hair loose. Shit, the clothes. WHAT! Why do I care!? The are cosplayers. With realistic weapons. Oh my God. They might be real. Shit. Shit, shit shit. Cosplayers, murderes with real weapons. Great._

Thorin was the first person in the room that recovered from shock and ripped my from my thoughts. He stepped forward with his sword aimed at me and looked into my eyes with suspicion.

''Who are you?'' He asked, his voice threathing. I couldn't speak. My mouth were moving but no sound came. My mind was screaming._ He nailed Thorin's voice too. Oh God they are way too realistic. But they can't be real! It's not a goddam fanfiction. And if they are real. Then... THE Company is here. Thorin Oakenshield is speaking to me, probably thinking I am enemy. The dwarves are in my house... Nooo, Impossible. Or possible. I have to think. I have to eat. WAIT! _Suddenly the most horryfing thought at that moment crossed my mind:

** MY TOASTES ARE LYING ON THE FLOOR AND I'M FREAKING HUNGRY !**

So yeah… Begining of God knows what!

_**A/N: Okay that was chapter 1 ! Phew * sigh* that was hard. I had been writing it for 5 days xd. Starting with word count - 1491. Yep I rewritten it about 10 times xd. Found any mistakes ? Any suggestions ? Any paring you want ? Reviews always welcomed ! Need 5 to continue ! :)**_

_**Hugs and kisses to you all My Astonishing Apples :3**_


	2. Chapter 2: A bit of courage and toasts

**A/N:**

** Guess who's back ! Me! * eats toasts* Yep my character didn't get any but I did. * evil grin* ****So I decided to post another chapter. I must say wow. Wow wow and wow again. **

**60 freaking people read my story ! OH MY GOD you have no idea how happy I am. Made me smile like a maniac. * giggle ***

**Also I would like to thank Captain's doxy, LadyLucy1990, Ogregal, VampireRockBitch and ****hannahizar** **for following my story * hugs you tightly***

**Nightgirl2207: Just wrote this one ! :D**

**VampireRockBitch: Taking your advice this one will be shorter :).**

**Okay so I hope you will enjoy the next chapter of my weird story! **

**Also If anyone is confused:**

**"..." - talking**

_**Blah blah blah - **_**_thoughts _**

Previously on Totally Unexpected Adventure:

''Who are you?'' He asked, his voice threathing. I couldn't speak. My mouth were moving but no sound came. My mind was screaming._ He nailed Thorin's voice too. Oh God they are way too realistic. But they can't be real! It's not a goddam fanfiction. And if they are real. Then... THE Company is here. Thorin Oakenshield is speaking to me, probably thinking I am enemy. The dwarves are in my house... Nooo, Impossible. Or possible. I have to think. I have to eat. WAIT! _Suddenly the most horryfing thought at that moment crossed my mind:

**MY TOASTES ARE LYING ON THE FLOOR AND I'M FREAKING HUNGRY !**

Yes, you might think I am crazy that in situation like that I thought about food. Well I might be kinda crazy. I honestly think I am insane. How could I thought they were real? I mean they were... But nevermind let's get back to what happened next!

My brain slowly started to register what was going on. My eyes decided it was the high time to leave ''Thorin'' and danced around the room. Everyone were now standing behind ''Gandalf'' staring at me and/or their ''leader''. I saw that most of them were confused, some terrified, only Dwalin remained indifferent. _Damm, dude totally nailed Dwalin._ The room wasn't as damaged as I thought it would be. I mean sure, the book shelf looked as if I threw my brother on it, but what is most important still hanged!, The hangings were lying on the floor torn in a few places, the cushions were in rather good condiotion ( i don't mind a few stains ). The floor what is more walls looked rather fine not counting a few scratches and stamps of what I hoped was mud. Let's just say living room looked as if me and Jack decided to do some karate fight.

_Worse happened._ Yep. Once we had a ,,fantastic'' idea to become sumo wrestlers. So everything would be fine, if only my bro hasn't broken TV and the window, breaking my arm in proccess ( don't ask). I have never seen mom and dad THAT mad before. Oh, sorry! Again changing the topic. I swear I won't do it again !

My eyes lazily traveled through the room until they spotted something that shattered my heart into million pieces.

'' My toasts " I said with a broken voice suddenly forgeting about the whole group in front of me. _Shit! Those were the best toasts I ever did and now they are on the floor. Nooo. Come on. _Call me a drama queen but I actually felt tears froming in my eyes and my lip trembling. My left hand tried to reach the bread of Gods ( Yes that much obsessed), but it was quite hard since it was the only part of my body that I could move. _Curse you shock!_ '' Toasts come back, come back'' I whispered, my eyes never leaving the great meal. I bet I said that better than Kate Winslet in Titanic.

'' What? '' I heard a confused voice. Unfortunately the ''never leaving'' eyes had to abandon the toasts. It was Cosplayer King ( good name right ? ) who asked me. I glared at him for breaking my ''epic'' moment. He was still holding the Orcrist dangerously close to my face. I took my time to examine the blade. Yep I'm a geek. It was perfect replica. I have seen the movies so many times but the beauty of the blade never stoped to amaze me. I have seen many copies of Orcrist but none of them were THAT ideal and precise. I have one on my own, but mine is not even half this... well, majestic as his. This one looked as if was made by real Elves. _I wonder how much he payed. _ _Damn even if he is a cosplayer, the sword is way too freaking realistic. What if they are real.? NO Caroline don't be ridiculous. They can only be some ehmm. Well shit I don't know. Shit shit shit..._ I looked away from the blade just to find a pair of sapphire eyes staring at me. Damn if only looks could kill, I would be dead in matter of seconds. Don't get me wrong. True he was basically shooting daggers at me with those eyes but I could not help but to stare back. _I could lookin these eyes for hours. Carbon copy of Richard Armitage. Ughh Stop it ! _I scolded myself. _It's not the time you fantasize about actor/character you will probably never meet! _My thoughts were rudely interrupted by the subject, or should I say clone of the subject, of my fantasies.

_'' _I asked, who are you **_woman?_**'' He growled at me with venom in his words, moving Orcrist closer to my face. _Woman? Did he just call me a woman ?!. _I felt anger taking over me what is more the paralysis leaving my body. No one, (shall I repeat?) no one calls me woman! I took a deep breath and with one swift move I deprived him of his own weapon using the kitchen knife. Don't ask me how. Sometimes I turn into a ninja. Orcrist flew a few meters away landing softly on the couch followed by a few gasps from the ''Company''.I felt myslef smile. _ Ha! Take that you pig! _The Cosplay King looked at me with disbelief which was soon replaced with fury.

'' What do you think you are doing woman!?'' He hissed through gritted teeth. _He called me woman again. And he dares to ask what do I think I am doing!? _That was it. I am a pacifist ( usually) and really hate violence but I thought I should make and exepction. I was not going to hit him, Gods no! However I would definitely give him a piece of my mind. Taking a brave step forward I was now standing no less than 20 cm from him. It was not an exact face to face because he was a bit shorter than me. His head reached my brows so I decided to bend my knees a bit to have our eyes at the same level. My action made him growl in response. I didn't really care.

'' Listen up you freaking cosplayer. If I hear you call me woman one more time I swear to God that your handsome face will soon look worse than Goblin's ass!'' I saw his eyes grew a bit wider and heared him let out yet another growl. He opened his mouth to speak but I stopped him raising my hand and knife.

''You dare to ask me who I am ?! I am the owner of this house and you and your little group - I pointed at the ''Company'' and Gandalf standing a few feet away from us - are freaking burglars! What the hell you thing you're doing ?! I mean okay, cosplay is cool I have done it on my own but seriously!? - I threw my hands in the air - Breaking into someone's home dressed as Thorin Oakenshield Company? What kind of sick fun is that? You are some crazy cosplayers?! You destoyed my salon! How the hell did you even get here? Doors are locked and so are the windows. Maybe you are serial killers who like to torture people!? Ehmm. No. God was uncalled for. You don't look like killers. No. I take that back - I said quickly sending an apologetic look to Bofur who just noded and a small smile appeared on his face.

''Still why would you do that? Cosplay is great and I would have helped you if you needed something, even though I don't know you I love to help people, but you seem to already have the whole outfit perfectly done, so my question still stands. Why the hell come here !? Is this some kind of a joke Jack came up with?! Urghr why I am even mentioning my brother.. Now I will be nice and not gonna call the police if you explain to me WHAT THE HELL are you doing! I must say costumes are impressive and you nailed Armitage's sexy voice but still I want answears '' I screamed at him. A lot of emotions floating trough me. What I said might have not made sense at all. I mean I bet you had to read it twice to understand what I meant but I can't help beeing messy when it comes to talking. Especially talking while enraged. _Wait, Did I say he had a handsome face and sexy voice?! Shit. _I felt my cheeks turning a light shade of red. _Ahh screw that ! At least what I said was true. Honesty for the win. _

I was breathing heavily like a dog after a run and ''Thorin'' was staring at me shocked by my outburst. My hands were in the air again.

'' Ughh stop staring at me as if I just spoke some Elvish. Just answear.'' I said impatiently. Shock left him faster than I could blink and again he was his angry self. God I thought I was bipolar.

'How dare you speak in that manner to a king?'' he asks his voice raised. You say what!? Was this guy serious?

'' Okay cut it! Stop the cosplay for a second and answear my question!'' I said my voice demanding.

'' I do not know what cosplay and you do not make any sense,_ **girl**_, so I will not answear your question!'' He held his head high when he said that. Oh God. _Wow. Not only hot but grumpy and rude like Thorin. Good job. _

'' What you mean you don't know what cosplay is!? Then why the hell are you dressed as Thorin Oakenshield? And what about the rest !?'' I asked not quite knowing what was going on. If this guy didn't know what cosplay was then why would he be dressed like that. I looked at the group behind the '' wizard''. They were no longer behind him actually, they were slowly approaching us their eyes locked on mine. This was when something hit me. Every normal person would have already cracked up and laughed. They didn't. It meant they:

a) were pretty good actors

b) The characters from my beloved book just came to life and are standing in front of me.

Great. Now I will have to question my sanity.

'' How do you know who I am? WHAT else you know about us?''

'' Wait. Wait. Who you are? You say you are Thorin Oakenshield? THAT Thorin Oakenshield? Yeah right and I am a Queen of England. '' I answeared mockingly and narrowed my eyes. He did the same. I saw him clenching his fists. We stared at each other for what felt like hours when all of a sudden I felt a warm hand touch my arm, involuntarily I looked up and saw Gandalf smiling at me.

'' I believe that both sides are rather confused about what is happening. I guarantee you lady...'' He trailed off and waited for me. For a second I did not quite understand what was taking place. Just a second._ Okay ONE guy can do the voice perfectly, but TWO?! Okay no way. They would have to practise for years. Or maybe they are truly real? I will have to check that. Somehow... _Yes all these thoughts took me about a second. - Fast thinker.

'' Caroline - I answeared - but I ain't any lady or miss so don't call me that'' I said calmly and noded signalising Gandalf to carry on.

'' Yes. I guarantee you laa... Caroline that we mean no harm. We were simply exploring the trolls cave when suddenly the ground opened and the next moment we found ourseleves in your... place '' He explained their situation to me and I as a true Hobbit ( and Sherlock ) fan started a deduction. That consisted of frowning my forehead and pursig my lips, bringing one hand to hold my jaw.

_Wait. He says they were exploring the cave... Sooo it means that they were to be eaten by trolls no less than, well lets's say 20 minutes ago. The whole Troll Scene starts in about 60th minute of the movie. There is still 109 minutes to go, 122 if this is extended version. Basicly the adventure haven't even started yet. Well it did, but it didn't as for much of action. ( You get it right ? ). Thorin still doesn't like Biblo. They haven't been in Rivendell yet. Ahh that's a pity. This place is so freaking beautiful. God I wish I could meet Elrond and Arwen and E__elladan and Elrohir... Ugh stop thinking about elves stupid! Nevermind. Where was I? Ahh right. So nobody is hurt. Good. Well I have no idea what to think about that. Shit. I might be going crazy. Why would I even believe they are real ? Hmm gotta make someone do something to prove it. I know! Gandalf is a wizard. Make him do a wizard-y trick! Ha genius! Ehhh my deduction is not good when I am hungry. Wait. I am hungry. I. AM. HUNGRY! Those bastards ruined my toasts!. Damm I have to make new ones. Grrr. _

_OKay talk to them. Jeez they are staring..._

As the thoughts rolled through my head, various emotions could have been seen on my face. After realising that I must have looked like an idiot I decided it was high time to speak. I took a deep breath.

''Okay let me get this straight. You were in troll cave. So basicly you say you are Gandalf the Grey ? And this is THE Thorin Oakenshield Company?'' I asked in a suspicious yet calm voice. It still seemed impossible. I had to have answears.

'' Yes, my name is Gandalf the Grey. And you are correct to say that this is Company of Thorin Oakenshield. However I do not understand, how do you know this? '' came the wizard's reply. How was I supposed to answear that? Hey, in my world you guys are books and movies!? And guess what I know who dies?! Yes, great idea.

'' Not important right now, sweetie'' I waved my hand '' What is important, is my main question. Are you REAL Gandalf? How can I know you are not a cosplayer huh? Costume is impressive, voice acting amazing... But still. I need to decide.

Call the police because you are burglars in fancy clothes OR call the psychiatrist cause I might have gone crazy OR it's freaking magic and book/movie characters are alive!. I need a proof. Something, anything.''

'' Why should we prove anything?'' asked an irritated voice that belong to Thorin. I sent Gandalf apology smile and slowly turned to the King.

'' Listen Grumpy ass I might like your character but you are total jerk right now. I am trying to come to terms with mister Magic over here and I so kindly ask you to shut up for 5 more minutes. Is this clear your majesty?'' I ask mockingly, sending him my best smile and fluttering my eyelashes. I even curtsed. The look on his face was worth it. I swear if I was in a different situation I would have laughed rolling on the floor. Thorin didn't seem so amused for he shot me another glare and let out another deep growl. I just rolled my eyes._ He's such a drama queen. Even bigger than I am. _

'' Well guys back to the main topic. Do something only a person from Middle Earth would do! I know! Gandalf, if you truly are a wizard then can you do a magic trick? '' I enquired with hope in my voice.

If he was Gandalf, then why would I miss a free show? While the wizard was busy deciding whether or not it is a good idea to show me some magic, I decided I should take a look at the crowd I was surrounded by. King under the Mountain was pissed and God I don't know why but his face made me chuckle.

Oin, Gloin, Nori and Bombur were whispering to each other pointing their fingers in many directions. _They must be __discussing why my room looks like that. Poor things. They must think I am some crazy girl. EHH.. Wait. Poor me then! _

Ori, Dori and Bofur were examining the photo that hang over the fireplace. I must say my dad has a good taste in that stuff. It showed Marylin Monroe in her most famous pose. ( You know the pic) All I have to say is that they were staring at her legs blushing deeply._ Men. Always for the body parts. _I thought. My favourite part of the picture was her smile. Really. I absolutely adored her face. I still do. I heard Ori saying something like '' it's inappropriate '' to which his friends noded furiosuly in agreement. I tried hard not to laugh on this one. If they thought that was inappropriate then they should never go to the beach. _Oh God. Dwarves on the beach. Hhahahahah. Bombur only in swimming pants with no shirt. Big belly Hahhha.. Oh . Bad image! Aghhh it's burning my eyes. MY EYES. EWWWW. Think about something better. Think Kili and Fili shirtless. Ahhh better, much better. Damn hot. Or Thorin. Awww yeah. Ughhh Caroline stop drooling over them! _

I couldn't help the wave of giggles that escaped me. Oh I am silly. I brought a fist to my mouth to tame the sounds coming from me and decided to move on with ''observations'' Bifur was still holding his weapon, probably in case I attacked them ( yeaahh that's gonna happen), Balin was sitting on my couch and seemed to be deep in thoughts. Dwalin stood in the same spot he did when I first saw him. The only one to remain calm. I frowned. _Wait where are Fili and Kili?_ As soon as the thought crossed my mind, my eyes started to roam the living room. It took me a few seconds to notice them. Those two were up to something, I could tell that just judging the look on their face. _What you wanna do ?_ As soon as the thought crossed my mind I realised that my mother's chinese vase caught their attention. I felt color drain from my face. _Shit. If they break that my mom will break me! _I saw Kili's hand slowly trying to reach it. _Over my dead body! Mom would kill me if I touched that, wonder what she would do to them! _I narrowed my eyes and let out a deep growl, even deeper than Thorin's. That worked. Kili's hand stopped mid air and was now about 10 cm from the antique. His head turned in my direction. I crossed my arms and let out another growl, showing him I want him to stay away from the vase. He seemed to understand my animal like sounds, because I saw him withdraw his hand, then he sent me the cutest apology smile I have ever seen and winked at me. I gave him an approving nod and felt my ears turn light shade of red.

_Oh God he is so sweet. Even when he is in trouble he is like a little kitten. Awww. Imagine him in kitty ears. AWWW._

''Alright'' Gandalf's voice ripped me from my ''Kili The Kitten'' world.

'' Alright what ?'' I was quite confused. Damn you Kitty Kili! I forgot what was happening just a few seconds ago.

'' Alright, I will show you ehm. A magic trick'' The wizard explained calmy. It took me a while to procces what he said. _Aaaa. I asked him do to some abrakadabra. Right. _I noded my head in excitement. I heard him chuckle and before I could blink, million lights filled my salon. What I saw was undescribable.

_ I believe you wanted to read the description of these right? Like I said. Undescribable. However if you want to feel what I felt at that moment... Close your eyes and try to imagine the best, the most colorful, the beautifulest ( if that word exists), the craziest fireworkshow ever. Got it? Yay. Then let's go back to the story!_

I felt my eyes widen and my jaw drop. I might have looked like and idiot but I didn't care. This was amazing. All of a sudden a light/firework butterfly landed on top of my nose. God, it was such a cutie. Glittering red and blue wings were perfect. It's cobalt black eyes met my grassy green ones. We stared at each other simply admiring our view. Slowly I raised my hand to pet it, however this ''animal'' was faster and soon disappeared into thin air. I giggled and spuned around like a little child. I felt eyes of the Company on myself but it didn't matter. To be honest I forgot about them. (Yes nasty habbit to forget things). I danced in the light for about 10 minutes when abruptly all of it just died out and so did my smile. Realization hit me with the strength of thousand warriors ( epic comparsion ).

_OH. MY. GOD. THEY ARE REAL! OH SHIT. Shit, shit, shit. But how? What?! I am going crazy. OH God this is real Gandalf. And real dwarves, and real hobbit. Awww damn. Wait. I said that Thorin had a handsome face and sexy voice to REAL Thoirn. * mental smack* Idiot. Oh God. Urghhh Dumbass, moron, idiot, dullhead. Okay. Don't stand like that do something. Something! _

'' Well, Caroline I hope that resolved any doubts, correct? '' asked Gandalf in a merry tone.

'' Y-Y-Yes. I believe you n-n-now. '' I stuttered. All amounts of courage I had earlier, fled and were replaced by confusion and well, slight fear. I felt my hands sweating - it was a sing I was nervous. I had no idea what to do. What you do with 13 dwarves, wizard and hobbit in your home!? I have read fanfictions but then every single one seemed useless. I knew I should say something else but I couldn't. I know. I am bipolar. One second I am all '' pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows'' and second I am like '' Aw shit I have to hide. Me so scared''. So yeah. I was in the seocnd one then.

''Lady Caroline, are you okay?'' a concerned voice enquired. It belonged to Ori.

'' Y-Yeah I'm fine'' Lie. It was a lie. With all eyes focused on me how was I supposed to be fine. I took a deep breath, and then another and another. It was not helping. It was easier to think that they were cosplayers. It made more sense. I had thought that having proof they were real would make things better but it only got them worse.

'' Are you not going to say something?'' I heard Thorin's venomous voice. _What a jerk. Can't he see I have a panic attack!?_ He wanted me to talk and well, you don't say no to royalty. One last deep breath. I haven't planned the words that escaped my mouth. I can assure you they were not what I wanted to say, but well pressure...

'' Pink fluffy unicorns dancing on the rainbow!'' I said in a high pitched tone and then( shame) I passed out leaving some of my '' guests'' confounded or when it came to mister King, quite pissed. If the fact that I fainted in front of The Oakenshield Company wasn't enough, I landed centrally on the toasts, butter in my nose. That reminded me something.

_I AM HUNGRY! _I thought angrily.

**A/N: Okaay so here is chapter 2 ! I hope you liked it * shy smile *. I hate to say it was hard to write - I have a lot going on at home so to find time to write is extremely hard. Any mistakes? I am sorry * bows in shame* Hahahah. So yeah what can I say. Caroline is like me. And I am totally bipolar. Sooo Caroline knows that they are real but what is she gonna do bout that? I know I know! * Gollum voice* Shut up! Don't spoiler. I hope you are still there and that you will leave a rewiev! :). **

**Hugs and Kisses to you all Beautiful B****utterflies**


	3. Slow start of adventure and toasts

**A/N:**

**Okaaaaay so here's chap 3 ! Yay . Hhahaa. Just wanted to say my jaw dropped on the floor when I saw that 167 people read this story. I squeaked and jumped like a kid and my mom assumed I am crazy. Haaa. I love you all *heart*. I am glad some of you laughed or at least smiled. Once more, great thanks for my followers and reviewers and favouriters :D. * Hugs everyone and gives them candy *.**

**So I got a question from VampireRockBitch. She asked if the chaps gonna be 4 k long.**

**Honestly I don't know. I always try to write around 4 k. But maybe they will be 4 k's or 3k's or 2k's if I am lazy. We will see. I still have no idea how this story will end xd. But I have an idea for another one but I decided I must fininsh this one. Ughh. Okay so I hope you enjoy my scribble :).**

**Ps. I am really sorry for not updating earlier but you know - school not cool :.**

**...**

_Previously on Totally Unexpected Adventure:_

_' Are you not going to say something?'' I heard Thorin's venomous voice. What a jerk. Can't he see I have a panic attack!? He wanted me to talk and well, you don't say no to royalty. One last deep breath. I haven't planned the words that escaped my mouth. I can assure you they were not what I wanted to say, but well pressure..._

_'' Pink fluffy unicorns dancing on the rainbow!'' I said in a high pitched tone and then( shame) I passed out leaving some of my '' guests'' confounded or when it came to mister King, quite pissed. If the fact that I fainted in front of The Oakenshield Company wasn't enough, I landed centrally on the toasts, butter in my nose. That reminded me something._

_I AM HUNGRY! I thought angrily_.

ZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzzZzzz.

First thing I felt when I realized I was awake, was pain. Not the Ughhh-I-have-to-get-up pain, but the I-must-have-done-something-bad-if-it-hurts-like-that-oww pain. My head, back, butt and arms were killing me. _Owww, what the hell?_ I had no freaking idea what had happened. I let out a groan and tried to open my eyes. That was a bad idea. The light from the lamp above my head hurt me. I swear if that thing was alive it would have probably been laughing at me. I covered my eyes and hissed, cursing my ''vampirism'' ( I hate light but I am afraid of darkness -wtf ? ). My right hand slowly found it's way to my forehead. I wanted to massage the pain away, it usually worked, however when I touched my front, my hand froze. _ Ohh shit. Awww that hurts!. _Under my fingers I felt a quite big lump. It was a seize of a 50 cents coin or at least close it. I let my soft fingers travel across my face and fortunately I hadn't found any other damage, however I did a touble touch to this little ball on my head. It hurt like hell, but oh the river of thoughts flooded my mind.

_Ugghhhhhhh what the hell happened? Jackie hit me with a baseball bat again...? Nah, this little shit would have been bigger if I my bro decided to use my head as a ball. I got dunk? Damn IF I did parents would kill me. Nooo. Jackie is not home... If Jackie is not home, then we didn't have a party and if there was no party there was no __alcohol.. That means I was not drunk. Oh God thank you. Plus a hangover isn't like that. (_Never had one, but Jackie had over 100 so I know what does it feel like )_ also what... Hmm. I might have fallen of the stairs... Nah. Then I would not have a bruise on the head but on the ass probably... What then... Maybe Miss Suarez was making her Flying Meatballs? Oh God NO. If that happened I wouldn't be that hungry. Ahhh. Miss Suarez's Meatballs... I love those. Would kill to get any right now. Meatballs. Mmm. Ughh Focus!. Okay, not my bro, not the stairs, not miss Suarez.. It could always be a giant fly that hit me when I was asleep... Haa that would be great. Okay then maybe Debbie came over ? No, she wouldn't have left me like that. She might be a bitch sometimes but she would never leave me in that state, on the sofa in the living room... Wait, what!? Why the hell am I in the living room ?!_

I was confused. I never sleep in the salon. I mean, sure falling asleep happened but only if someone was around. Plus If my bro was home he would carry me to my bedroom. But I would never EVER fall asleep on the salon couch alone. _ What the fuck?_ Painfuly I sat on the couch and rubbed my eyes. _I need a painkiller. NOW. _I tried to get off the sofa, but my muscles decided it was a perfect time to start a riot. _I growled. Get up you lazy red fleshy, squishy things! I want a pain killer and that will help you too morons. _I was talking/thinking to my body parts. It took them about 10 minutes to consider my proposition and then, with quite a few difficulties, I could stand. I took a deep breath and tried to strech a little bit. My brother always used to say: _**If you ass hurts strech it out, If it still hurts massage it and if that doesn't work, it means you need another ass.**_ I giggled a little bit when I thought about my bro's saying. He would always say it in an old man's grumpy voice. Oh God priceless. I started with my head or should I say neck. Circles to the right, to the left, up and down, massage time and repeat. I did the same with the rest of my body and I must say, I believe it was grateful. The pain was smaller however that didn't mean I would not get the pills. I was about to leave the room when I heard voices.

'' We can't trust her''

''She is the only one who can help us...''

" But did you see what she has on the walls?.."

" Or how she reacted?''

'' We can't trust her, she.."

"Shut up I say we have to.."

Those voices clearly belonged to men and I would never invite a men over! Okay I would, but only my parents's friend or Jackie's friends! And no more than 2, while I heard at least 5. _What the hell is going on?! Some of these voices sound familiar, as if I heard them not long ago..._

'' Come on, we should check if the lass is awake'' said one of the voices.

'' Later Balin. Now we need to discuss where did the bloody wizard disappear.''. Balin!? _OH MY GOD. _ That was the moment when all of the events of last night came rushing into my mind. My computer breaking, going to Jackie for help, packing, my bro leaving to Italy, beeing hungry, wanting to eat toasts, planing on watching a movie and... The dwarves. The Thorin Oakenshield Company. _ Holly shiiitttttttt._ _Okay * mental slap* _I also slapped myslef for real. _Keep it cool you already made a fool out of yourself by fainting. Okay... You can do this. They are just your favourite childhood characters... And some of them are your crushes. Hot Damn.. _

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, bracing myslef. I could do that. I have been through a lot of nervous situations, that was nothing new. Well I have never met a fictional character... Okay forget that.

'' I see you are awake lass '' Kili's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. My eyes flew open and met his hazel ones. He sent me a cheeky grin and winked at me, causing me to blush. _Here I met my crush number 1. _He laughed at my reaction and that kinda irritated me. However the negative feeling quickly vanished as I imagined him as a Kitty. That made me giggle.

'' Yeah well, what host I would be if I slept all night! I mean I probably fainted for hours. How long was I out by the way?'' I asked him curiously. I decided it was best to play cool, even if inside I was still screaming _HEEEE'SS SOOOO CUTEE! OMG I WANNA TOUCH THESE HAIR. _His eyebrows knitted in confusion and he tilted his head.

'' You weren't out. You were lying on the couch entire time.'' He said calmy and I face palmed myself. Of course he wouldn't know what I meant. In Middle Earth they don't speak like that.

'' Ughh. I meant how long was I unconscious? '' I asked again. He let out a long ''aHHHH '' signaling me that now I spoke like a normal person. I nodded my head and giggled again.

'' Not long MIss Caroline. Around 30 minutes '' My eyes widened and I didn't even bother to correct him with this ''Miss/Lady'' thing. _Only 30 minutes ?! It felt as if I slept the whole night! _On the other hand it was a lot. What could dwarves do in 30 minutes? What they did in Bilbo's house was, well awesome to watch but terrible to live. If they had done the same to my house, Oh boy, mum would have ripped me apart before I could blink. I am not kidding.

I bit my lower lip hard. I knew I had to check the house and then be the '' I-am-at-your-service-host-'' thing. I guess Kili saw I was worried because he came to me and put his hand on my arm. I looked at him questionably.

'' Don't worry Miss Caroline, last time I checked everything was alright. Not touched, not destroyed.'' He said calmy.

'' And when was this last time you check ?'' He opened his mouth but no answear came. At least I didn't hear it because my all atention was drawn to one sound I wished I NEVER heard.

The sound of a broken glass. Before the prince realised what happened, I ran to the family room. My heart was beating faster than ever, I could hear it in my ears. I expected to find the window broken or worse, a few windows broken or maybe my mother's glass tableware broken in pieces. I even expected to find the giant, black chandelier on the floor but I surely didn't expect THAT. There in the middle of the family room, on the black wooden floor 3 shocked dwarves - Bifur, Bombur and Nori were lying covered in shattered glass pieces. _Why are they covered with glass?_ The realisation hit me hard and I felt my eyes widen, ( God they will fall out someday...). Something was missing in the room. And when I mean something I mean a giant stag, made of glass. My father's wedding gift to my mom. ( PLease don't ask why my dad bought my mum a stag. He doesn't know that either). _HOLYYYYYYYY SHITTTTTT. PARENTS GONNA KILL ME!. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_. The rest of the company entered the room about a second after me and also was shocked by the sight.

I started to hyperventilate. That was when they noticed my presense.

''Ahhh I see you are awake lass'' I heard Balin's voice. Not that crap again. Yes I was awake. No shit Sherlock. My breathing started to speed up. The white haired dwarf saw my reaction and asked me with concern

'' Are you okay lass?''

'' HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE OKAY IF THEY BROKE THE STAG!'' I screamed pointing furiously at the 3 dwarves that were now slowly getting up.

'' Uhhh. What stag?''

'' THE STAG MADE OF GLASS. GOD REALLY? THAT WAS MY FATHER'S GIFT TO MY MOM. A WEDDING PRESENT! I KNOW YOU COULDN'T HAVE KNOWN BUT WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU EVEN TRY TO GET ON IT?! '' I was furious and scared.

All of the sudden I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. When I looked in the direction I saw Bifur looking at me apologetically. He mumbled something in Khuzdul and ofcourse I didn't understand.

'' He says we are sorry AND that he will do his best to rebuild it. He never saw such a beautiful thing and well...'' It was Bofur who gave me the translation. I sighed. I knew I was being a bitch.

'' Then why did he destroyed it? Okay nevermind I don't want to know that. '' I put my hands in defeat, then glared at Bifur. '' You better keep this promise to rebuild it, if not I will make sure the axe in your head will stick out of your ass '' I threatened. His eyes widened and he nodded furiously.

'' And you two '' I pointed at Nori and Bombur '' better help him. I don't want the poor guy do the whole work.'' I said softly. Ahhh the mood swings. It was when I realised I shouted at the Company and behaved like an idiot. AGAIN.

I facepalmed myself and growled. _I am making a fool out of myself!_ I felt eyes on me and let's just say I didn't like the feeling.

'' Okay... So I guess we had a.. um... rough start. But I don't want to be a bad guy in this whole mess. I know I behave like a scary kid sometimes, it's just in my nature. So... Ummm. I gues... Umm... I should probably introduce myslef shouldn't I ?'' I was nervous again. A few heads nodded. Okay here it goes.

'' Okay. So, my name is Caroline, No Miss no Lady, just Caroline. I am the owner of this house. I mean my parents are but when they are away I get to rule here. Unless my brother is here but he is not so... Yeah I am the queen of the house. I am really sorry for the reactions I gave you... I mean the whole screaming, shouting, fainting thing. I am really bi polar. Plus I am before my period so I am a total bitch right now. Haaha. Sooooooo...

You guys must have a few questions right now right?'' I asked.

'' We have a lot of questions girl'' said a gruffy voice. Anger build in me again but I decided to tame it. No more emotion bursts! I turned slowly and gave my best smile

'' I asked you not to call me that.'' we started glaring at each other. Icy blue againt emerald green. The ''fight'' would have lasted longer if our favourite wizard.

'' I believe we should sit down and discuss a few matters like civil poeple'' He said.

'' You are right Gandalf, as always'' I agreed politely.

We all ended up in the dining room. It was one of the biggest rooms in my house. We were right about to start our '' discussion'' when I heard a few sounds coming from the dwarves. I guessed they had heard them too because they started to blush. It took me a second to understand what happended and when I did I felt like an idiot. AGain.

'' Oh my God! I am so sorry ! You guys must be starving! What a moron I am. Stupid stupid stupid! '' I scolded myself. Then, all of a sudden I heard my stomach make the same sound. '' I guess I have yet another thing to apologise for.''

The laughter of the Company filled the air. Everyone were amused. Everyone expect the King ofcourse. Thorin only scoffed. What a jerk. I looked at them and not knowing why I felt a great need. A need to change their fate, to help them somehow with the journey. When I looked at Bofur and his hat I felt my heart laugh, looking at Bifur, Bombur, Nori and Dori I couldn't help but smile. Ori made me giggle, Fili and Kili, well they were my kittens now. Oin, Gloin and Dwalin were still not my favourites but I started to feel about them as like about friends. Balin reminded me of my grandfather, Bilbo of my cousin and Gandalf, well Gandalf will always be my wizard and hero. Thorin reminded me of Grumpy. At least he did then. I had no idea why I felt like I did at that time. It just hit me like a lightning. Just like that. All of a sudden they became my family. I know it sounds ridiculous because I haven't even talked to half of them but... I just couldn't stop the feelings. My stomach let out another growl. I laughed.

'' Well, I guess we should get something to eat. Who likes Chinesse food?'' I asked. Then I realised something elese. _**I still had a desire for toasts!**_

**_BBBBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb?_**

_**A/N: OKAAAAAAAAAAY HERE IS CHAPPY 3 ! YAY * POPS OPEN THE CHAMPANGE! I want to thank anyone who read that. I know it has been a long time since last update but I have school and a lot going on right now. This chapter is shorter and I know that some said I should write shorties so here!. Ehhhh. I just wanted to say thay the REAL Fun is just getting started. I mean. Next chappy we gonna witness Dwarves eating manners, a lot of questions, Thorin being a dick ( I LOVE THAT GUY BUT I LOVE TO WRITE HIS AS ASSHOLE XD), AND Kili the Kitten xd. So stay turned for the next chappy! **_

_**I plan to post it next week, if not then in 2 weeks from today! I hope you guys will stay with me * shy smile ***_

_**Love you all and ofcourse review my Cute Cucumbers! * Hugs you all thightly * **_


	4. Questions and toasts!

**A/N: Okayyyy so time for chapter 4 my lovely readers! I love you guys so much!. Everyone who read this deserves a cookie ;). Haahah. No kidding ;D.**

**First let me just respond to the reviews! **

**VampireRockBitch: Yes new one was out xd**

**cookiemonsterblaaah: Glad you liked it ! :)**

**Me: Thank you for your honest opinion :). I know the last chappy wasn't perfect but oh well. I will try to write between 2 and 4 k's. That is fine with me. I will try more! Promise! **

**LadyDurin: Thank you, glad you liked it.**

**Megretria: I know it was not that good. Hhaha. Thx though.**

**Okaaay everyone! Thank you for all the rewievs AND for the views! The whole story has now 280 views! I mean wow. Wow. Wow. You are all amazing! **

**So... Quick summary of what happens in chapter 4:**

**Time to eat and ask questions... And some ****embarrassing situations included! **

**Hope you enjoy! XOXO**

**_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXO_****_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXO_****_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXO_****_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXO_****_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXO_****_XOOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXO._**

_Previously on Totaly Unexpected Adventure:_

_I had no idea why I felt like I did at that time. It just hit me like a lightning. Just like that. All of a sudden they became my family. I know it sounds ridiculous because I haven't even talked to half of them but... I just couldn't stop the feelings. My stomach let out another growl. I laughed._

_'' Well, I guess we should get something to eat. Who likes Chinesse food?'' I asked. Then I realised something elese. **I still had a desire for toasts!.**_

It took me 20 minutes to explain them what Chinesse food was. First they had difficulties with saying the word. Honestly I had no idea it was that HARD to say Chinesse for them. I laughed at their attempts earning a few glares here and there. I mean who would't ? I even spelled it for them. And yet all I got was '' Cheesn'', ''Chenis'' ''Chenes'' and yet my favourite one - said by the one and only, our dear healer Oin. I swear I laughed so hard I almost lost my breath. It may be me and my wierd sense of humor but who wouldn't find a Dwarf saying '' Cheese? Cheese food? I love Cheese. What? You lass say Cheese nipple ? Eww that would be awful'' funny ? So yeah. Our beloved healer thinks Chinesse PEOPLE are Cheese NIPPLE. Took me another 20 minutes to tell him what I meaned. God I loved his expression. But Cheese Nipples are not that important in this story. Unless we meet some. Nevermind...

Second thing, Dwarves thought that if the name is so hard to say then it must be some Elf food. Moreover they would NOT touch any Elf food. Mainly because well, ELVES (duh) and for elves eat only green food and our Company would not eat only leaves, as they put it. I spent about 30 minutes assuring them Chinesse food was not Elf made. I even showed them pictures of these dishes. They still were suspicious. _Damn this men! Dwarves I mean. Can't trust someone offering food. _I thought furiously. That was when Ori spoke up.

''Miss Caroline... I mean Caroline... Maybe we should... um... Just... Um...'' He was mumbling. Oh God he was so cute when mumbling. I wanted to take pinch his cheeks Granny Style but I mentally stoped myslef. _Doesn't mean I won't do that in future_ I thought slyly. He was so adorable.

''Yes Ori? Let it out? What do you want to say?'' my voice was soft, I knew this buddy was rather nervous person. He kept mumbling things under his breath and I swear, I understood Khuzdul more than I did this!. I sighted and kneeled.

'' How about you tell me this in my ear ? Hmm? Will that be easier? '' I am not the nicest person, but those puppy eyes. My God just like a little pup. _Hahahha. Fili and Kili are my Kitten's then Ori gonna be my little puppy. _

To that he turned the darkest shade of red I have ever seen. I thought he was going to explode or something. I got a little bit closer and put my hand on his forehead. _Wooooah. Puppy is burning. Oh God. This Pup is on Fireee. _It was noot my idea to make him uncomfortable. Shit.

_'' _Master Ori? Are you alright? '' Now I used some formalities. However that did not help. I leaned a bit more and... Let's just say I have not expected this cute little dwarf to do THAT.

Not even 5 seconds passed after I asked my question and I was met with a loud answear. Little Ori, sweet little Ori burped right into my face. It wasn't a short burp. It wasn't a light burp. No. Oh no. It was even longer than the one he let out in the movie. So I was kneeling there. On my dining room dark floor. With my eyes opened wide. Beeing burped at by a Dwarf.

I was so shocked by his outburst that I felt my jaw go slack. My brows went so high I thought that they wanted to leave my head. Not that I would be surprised by that. If I were them I would have already done that. So Ori's burp continued and so did my shock. Soon we were surrounded by the rest of the Company with bemused expressions. I can tell you that even DWALIN looked mirthful. Fili and Kili were ofcourse giggling like mad people. The rest tried to keep the face straight. Key word - tried. _Ughh yeah for you it is hilarious. To watch a girl dressed in a pyjama kneel in front of a Dwarf to give him some comfort to only be met a burp that would kill a Dragon. Hey. This is a good idea... _

As soon as the thought crossed my mind Ori's ''little'' accident ended. Thank God for that! We stared at each other for what seemed to be ages until he cracked.

'' OH MY GOD MISS CAROLINE I AM SO SORRY!'' he cried. '' I NEVER MENT TO DO THAT! I APOLOGIZE DEEPLY!''he bowed and with that he hit my head. Hard. I let out a hiss and soon landed on my back. Ori's eyes widened in shcok. He started panicking. I swear to God this cutie panicking is the sweetest thing ever! I couldn't hold my amusement any longer and soon I was laughing. I was laughing so hard that my stomach satrted to hurt. Ori looked at me if I was some kind of lunatic. I stood up never breaking the laugh. The rest of the Company joined in my laughter. Everyone expect for Lord Grumpy Royal Ass Pants.

'' It's okay Ori. Haahah. Nice asset you have here'' I said hiting him playfuly on the shoulder.

'' You're not mad Miss? I mean I just.. I '' Not the mumbling again! I held up my hand and sent him my best grin. He turned red a little bit but at least he didn't look like a tomato.

'' Sweetheart. I have an older brother. We had burping contests since we knew we could do that. What happened now is nothing new. But I admit you have a talent. Damn nice talent'' I winked at him.

'' Thank you Caroline. '' He said shyly.

'' You know. You might use againt Smaug. Haaa. Just imagine. You walk into the great halls of Erebor, stand straight before the dragon and let out such a monsterus burp. Dragon down ladies and gentelmen! Dwarves 1, Dragon 0 ! Woo - Hoo'' I shared my genius idea and was met with even more laughter. It made Ori blush ( again) but he was pleased with my idea. I loved their laughter, it made me feel so... safe. Soon we started to plan his burp attack at the Dragon. Let's just say I should never plan anything.

The food arrived and we Finally started to satisfy our stomach's. In the beggining Dwarves were reluctant to tase the food, stating it must be poisoned. I threatened to eat their dishes and not give them access to anything edible in my house if they didn't eat what I ordered, and well guess what. IT WORKED!

After about 20 minutes we were all enjoying our meals. And everyone knows how a Dwarf enjoys his meal. Noodles were flying through the room with the speed of light, so were the vegetables. Meet was devoured in a blink of an eye. They didn't care what happenes to the rest of the dish. I tolareted their little food fight. Why?

1. Great to watch

2. I love when people end up with noodles in their body parts.

3. I just love these guys too much. Plus I feel like Bilbo now!

So yeah. Soon the whole room was covered in all kind of vegetables and sauces.

''Bombur! Catch!'' I heard Bofur yell to his brother. I saw the egg land in the red head's mouth. _Just like in the movie. Hahah Oh God. Hey! Maybe they will sing! Oh that would be amazing! My own singing dwarves! But how do I ask them to do that..._

I decided that I would ask them to do that when all problems are sorted out. That reminded me of one thing. I gathered them here to discuss something important. I looked around the room and saw that I had mere chances to win their attention. They were so absorbed with their actions they have probably forgotten I was even there. My eyes caught Gandalf's and I sent him my best WE-WERE-SUPPOSED-TO-TALK look. He nodded and smiled. I expected him to silence them but he did no such thing. Instead of that he just took a few vegetables to his mouth and started to eat. I was puzzled by his behaviour. Have I not ''told'' his to shut them up. Gandalf just continued eating ignoring my attempts to contact him. I groaned and took quite big zucchini piece in my hand. I tried to throw it at the wizard, but curse my aim, it had to land on the Grumpy Ass. Exactly in the centre of his face. He looked as if he had put a mask on his eyes.

The laughs of the Company stopped as soon as they heard a loud splash. They looked at their leader what is more their eyes went as wide as plates. We should seriously stop doing the eye thing... I froze in my spot. _I just threw a zucchini at royalty. At the King. KING under the Mountain. Awwww shit. I am in deep shit. Oh shit. He might be a jackass but still he is important. Fuuuuck. He is gonna kill me. _The vegetable slowly made it way off the King's face. When it hit the table I knew I was screwed. I looked at Thorin and saw him sending me the death glare. I swear if looks could kill I would have already be lying on the floor in the pool of blood. If we had been a cartoon then I am 1000 % he would be steaming. I sent him an apology smile. He growled deeply. We had a stare fight again. This time I knew I was going to lose. His piercing blue eyes were totally crushing me from the inside. The silence was broken by a giggle. A giggle that belonged to not no one else but the wizard. His giggle soon turned into a full laugh. He looked at me amused.

_Sonuvabitch! He did that on purpose! He knew I would miss and not hit him! Gandalf I am going to kill you! You might be my favourite but I will end your life! _I thought angrily. This was not happening. Gandalf, out of all people here. I scoffed and broke the eye contact with Mister Butthurt.

'' Well. That solved the problem of the noise.'' Wizard said calmly streching his fingers a bit. '' Now Miss Caroline, I believe you wated to talk to us about something crucial? Am I correct?'' Again with the miss stuff. I let out a long breath I didn't know I was holding. True I gathered them for 2 reasons. Food and talk.

I nodded in agreement.

''Yes. I wanted to talk about how you got here and how I can help. I promise you that my home'' I streched my arms Jesus style showing them my whole house. '' can now be yours too. I know you guys are kinda lost and believe me you won't manage in this world. So I offer my help. I will provide you with food, place to sleep, some kind of entertiment, anything you need BUT I have some rules. Firts, don't touch anything unless I allow you to. Second, don't walk into my room uninvited. Third, do as I say or as Gandalf says. He is a wizard after all. Knows more than I do. So I guess you have questions. That is why I decided...''

''What if we don't want to do as you say girl?'' A pissed off rough voice interrupted my beautiful speech. King of the Assholes spoke again. _Why does he have to be so annoying! I am trying to help._ And again with the girl thing. I sighed and took another zucchini piece in my hand. This time it hit the target perfectly. The whole company gasped when they saw it land perfectly in the King's mouth, shutting him up. I grinned evily.

'' Then, _your majesty_'' I said mockingly '' you can as well sleep in my garden, starving. I guess it is not fit for the King, huh? Now shut up and let me finish, will ya? Gandalf?'' The wizard waved his hand telling me to continue.

I cleared my throat.

'' Like I said, before someone decided to cut in'' I shot Thorin a lot to which he spit out the vegetable '' I know you have questions. That is why I want you all to ask me one question. Think wisely. One question each.'' I sat down proud of myself. This was a great solution for both me and them. I heard a few grunts of agreement.

'' We can ask anything we want?'' I turned and saw this voice belonged to Dori.

'' Yes master Dwarf, anything. And with that question you just lost a chance to ask me something important'' I said matter of factly winking at him. Firslty he didn't quite understand, but as soon as he realised what I ment, he cursed under his breath but nodded in acknowledgement. I laughed lightly.

'' So how about we start from left? Dori you are out but still if your brothers agree, you can make them ask your question.''

How did the order from left looked like you ask. Well it went like that: Nori, Ori, Bifur, Dori, Balin, Dwalin, Thorin, Bofur, Goin, Oin, Bombur, Bilbo, Kili and Fili. Honestly I decided to do it this way, for I was afraid what questions did the young princes come up with. I could tell by their smirks, it was something embarasing.

'' Well Nori you're first. Your question?''

''What is this #cozbay# you were talking about?'' He asked seriously. _Cozbay? What the hell does he mean? Cozbay... Cozbay...Cozbay.. Aaaa! Cosplay! He means cosplay! Haahaha Genius me ! *Self five*. _

_'' _You mean _cosplay_?'' I aksed slowly. I was 50% sure he said that but wanted to be 100%. He nodded.

'' Like I said. What is this this cozbay?'' He asked stubbornly. I sighed. Okay no more How-You-Read-This tutorials.

'' _COSPLAY''_ I stressed the word '' is an amazing thing. Now, firstly I will give you the Wiki definition then my own. Cosplay is a performance art in which participants called cosplayers wear costumes and fashion accessories to represent a specific character or idea. Cosplayers often interact to create a subculture centered on role play and a broader use of the term "cosplay" applies to any costumed role play in venues apart from the stage. You can cosplay a character from a movie, Tv show, anime, manga, game, book anything you want.

Now you might not really understood that, so I will explain in my language. If you cosplay then you dress as your favourite character and pretend to be that person. When you put the costume on you stop being yourself and you become your beloved character '' I said dreamly and realised I might have scared them a little bit '' Don't worry it's not like you lose yourself! You still are who you are but well, you are also being someone else. I mean you must have read a book and had a hero. So basiclly cosplay is dressing as this guy and behaving like him'' I said proudly. Yes to answear your question I quoted wikipedia. I sat down and waited for another question.

'' Then why did you think we are this Costlayers? '' This time it was Ori's question. _Shit! How do I explain them that here they are just fiction... Aghhhh. WAIT! i KNOW!_

I smiled and answeared politely.

'' Because my dear Ori, your quest to reclaim Erebor is quite well known here. In my world you are all believed to be great warrioirs. This Journey was even written down by an amazing man J.R.R Tolkien, but I will tell you about that later.''

Soon I was bombarded with so many questions such as '' Who thinks we are great?'' or '' Do we slay the Dragon" or '' Who does that''? or '' How much do you know''. I answeared those questions with patience and caution. I couldn't tell them everything, that would be spoiler.

It took me an hour and the only ones left with their questions were the Durin heirs. I braced myself and waited for Thorin's question ( He asked for more time to think of a proper one).

''What do you expect in return ?'' He asked. I was shocked by this question. He really thought so low of me? I spent and hour talking, how much I want to help and how important this quest is also to me and he does this! Jerk.

Anger is starting to build in me but I try to control it. Afterall I promised not to burst with emotions. I took a deep breath and gave him my You-an-asshole-but-help-you-anyway smile.

'' Listen Oakenshield. I know you don't trust me. You have every reason not to. I get it. Elves betrayed you and all but I am trying to help. I don't expect any payment. I don't need gold, I am rich. I don't want jewelry, most of it is ugly. I don't want anything! For me you guys reclaiming your home is the best kind of payment. Can't you really believe me when I say I do that because I want to? Noooo. Our dear Royal Jackass has to be the pain in the ass. Ughhh I have no idea how I could have a crush on you!'' As soon as these words left my mouth I felt my cheeks turn a light shade of red. I just admited I had a crush on him. I prayed he didn't hear that. Thorin seemed to be satisfied with my answear even though I saw fire in his eyes.

'' Okay moving on. Kili what is your question?'' I took a sip of my water, my throat started to kill me. I looked at the younger heir just to see him grinning evily. Another sip of the water.

'' My dear Miss Caroline I think I have a perfect question.'' He said softly and I took one more sip of the water. _Something is up. I know that look. _'' Do you really find our Uncle's face handsome? '' To that I did the only think I could do at that time. The water I drank was now splashed all over the table. Not only I had it land on the table but also I had spit in Oin's eyes. The healer roared and started to rub his eyesight furiously. The Company laughed heartly. I started to choke on the water's leftover. I hit my chest a few time and finally was able to catch my breath. I sent Kili a murderous glare.

_He did not just asked what I think he asked! I swear to God, Valar, Mahal, Buddha whoever! That if he did I am going to kill him! Kill the Kitten ! Ughhh! _

''What did you say?'' I asked through gritted teeth and coughed again. With an innocence of a child he replied.

'' I asked you Lady Caroline if you found our Uncle's face handsome. You said earlier, and here I quote'' he cleared his throat and tried to sound like me. All I have to say is that he failed. but he didn't know that. _**"If I hear you call me woman one more time I swear to God that your handsome face will soon look worse than Goblin's ass!'' **_So my question is. Do you really think Uncle is handsome?'' He was now looking at me with amusement and pride. I have no idea what he took pride in. Probably pissing me off. I groaned and smacked myslef. Kitten let out a small giggle. Then an amazing idea hit me. Amazing for me at least. Deep breath.

'' Truth?'' I asked calmy.

'' Truth'' He demaned softly.

I glared at Thorin who seemed to be interested in my answear. I looked him straight in the eyes.

'' I find your uncle attractive, true. I believe he has amazing icy blue eyes and I admit I could stare in them for hours. He has gorgeous voice that used to make me go weak in my knees, now it sends shivers down my spine. His smile is stunning. The raven black hair makes him look dangerous. And the whole apperance. In my opinion he is just like chocolate cake. '' I narrowed my eyes '' A chocolate cake and I love cakes. So yes I find your Uncle extremely attractive and handsome'' I looked around to see that the Dwarves were all shocked by my answear. Ori was blushing. Like always. Everybody's jaws hunged open. Kili himslef looked stunned by my answear. He expected the truth. Fili looked at me if I was a madwoman. Well, maybe I was. Finally I looked at Thorin. He was opening and closing his mouth as if he wanted to say something but no words came out. I saw he was blushing. HE WAS BLUSHING. I HAVE MADE KING UNDER THE MOUNTAIN BLUSH! I loved this expression. I laughed.

'' Listen Grumpy Cake. I might find you attractive but that doesn't change the fact that you are annoying as Hell and make me pissed off everytime I look at you. As much as I adore the way you look, your character is horrible. At least what you have shown towards me. You think I have a crush at you because of you? Noo. I find YOU attractive because Richard Armitage is my perfection. Looks and personality. Don't get your ego grow too much Oaky'' I said and waved my hand dismissivly. Now the look of the Thorin I knew came back because he was glaring at me again. I stuck my tounge out. Very mature.

'' Okay! Everyone knows Caroline finds Durins attractive! Fili your question?'' I urged to move on.

'' Durins? So me and Kili are also handsome?'' He asked wriggling his eyebrows in a suggestive way. I groaned and slapped myslef menatlly. Men!

'' Yes, my kittens are also handsome. Okay can we establish that everyone here is super hot !? '' I aksed impatiently.

'' We are not hot lass, the temprature is fine'' Balin answeared.

I face palmed myslef. '' Google what I ment!'' I said exhausted.

'' Now the questions all answeared! So what do we do now Lady Caroline?'' Asked Kili. Again I wanted to strangle him. First I am no Lady, second still I have not forgiven him for that question!

I thought for a while and came up with a good idea.

''How about I show you around? You gonna stay here for a while aren't you? But remember, don't you dare to touch anything I have told you not to!'' My proposition earned grunts of agreement from the Company members.

'' Okay up we go!'' I said as I walked from the table, turning to the exit. '' We can start the whole tour with this floor, mainly because...'' I was cut off by an enormous bump. Turning around I was met with the sight of my dear dwarves standing proudly and the chairs they just sat on, overturned and broken. _Really? They_ _can't stand up without destroying something!? Ughhhh They are soooo repairing that!_ I raised my eyebrows and looked at them questionably. I was soon met with laughter. I shook my head and smiled. _They may destroy the whole house, but it will definitely be worth it._

_This is the wierdest thing that ever happened to me but I love every second of that. Ehhh. I am hungry again. Strange. I ate Chineese and my toasts. My toasts... I HAVEN'T EATEN THEM!_

_'' _Okay guys! First stop is the kitchen! I need to eat something!'' I told them happily and was answeared by even more laughter. Soon they followed me. I wondered what else is gonna happen to me on this little adventure.

LalalalalalallaLALALALALallalalaallalallallalalalaallalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

_**A/N:**_** It's here ! Dum dum dum! Finally. I don't know what I did but I fixed my comp, sort of. I don't have the files, they are gone forever. But at least it works rather well. **

**If You Found ANY grammar mistakes I am sorry * bows in shame* I tried to write fast and did not look at the words closely.**

**Soooooo. This chappy is shorter than what I orignally wrote but at least it has 4k's! I tried hard :). I hope you guys enjoyed my scribble :* * Hugs you all*Hahaha I hope I didn't offend any Chinese people! **

**Rewiev is like chocolate cake for me ;3.**

**Xoxo **

**Love you all my **

**Diamond Divas **


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